A Mom’s Heartache
They are growing up too fast…my husband and I catch ourselves saying that at least 3 times a week about our children, but in all honesty, it is very much true!
I met my husband when his daughter was only 4 months old, she will be 11 soon, just started 5th grade and when we see her we can’t help but remember the chubby little thing she use to be. My oldest son is now 6, he was born 2 months early, was so small and when I see this tall, slender boy bouncing everywhere, I can’t help but think, who are you? My daughter, 5, was the brightest eyed little thing, always laughing and smiling, and though none of that has changed, she is now far older than her years and thinking about make-up already. Then there is my youngest, my baby, who is no longer a baby at 4 and everyday his “big boy” ways amaze me. Everyday, I wonder where have my babies gone, but I know one day they’ll be even bigger and I’ll miss these days too.
I guess some of this came about the other day while going over some of their old baby clothes, blankets and toys and I couldn’t believe how incredibly small they had once been or how attached one (me) could become to a pair of newborn blue jeans or an old pacifier, but there they were, in the box and they will remain with me, always. My husband always smiles at me when I go over the things, maybe once or twice a year, I don’t know if he thinks I am silly or cute or both, but he indulges me and lets me babble about it all to him. I pick up the little things and smell them and wish ever so much that I could remember it all, but I can’t. Being a parent, a mother, watching your little babies grow to children, then to teens and into men and women whom each day “need” you less and less, is a heart wrenching, yet rewarding, job.
I view my children each day and wonder what they will become, who they will be and what slice of life they will take, all the while looking at them remembering how tiny their toes were, how cute their laughs were and the sound of their tiny footsteps but as parents we get so caught up in dishes and bills and the mundane everyday life, remembering what was, hoping for the future, that we forget about today.
Today is special, even if it feels that much less than, because today is a day you can never get back with your children. Tomorrow they will be bigger, taller, more self-reliant and the world keeps turning until that last time they come running to your bed because of a bad dream or that last time you pick up and carry your child around or that last time you are exactly and wholeheartedly, their everything.
My advice to all parents, including myself… remember, cherish, take lots of pictures and videos but don’t waste the time. Leave the dishes and just go for a walk with your children, hand in hand, because someday you’ll miss the chaos and charm of this time in your, and their, lives!
🙂 Bet and fam
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